Well, here I am. The end result of one too many Long Island iced teas. If I were you, I’d stop reading and go do something else. I usually only talk about myself when I’m forced to. I have nothing to say. If I were a contestant on The Price Is Right, I’d be the guy who lands on 20¢ and then 30¢. Me. Walking through life unannounced and uncaring. Merely an understudy.